Any discussion of Middle Eastern restaurants has to start, of course, with Ralph Nader. Or maybe Nader's parents, who immigrated from Lebanon, opened a restaurant, and hatched the favorite whipping-boy of those Republicans in drag, the Democratic Party. I feel nothing but pity and the urge to giggle in your face if you dismissed Nader and voted for Obama. My warmest congratulations to you for voting for a man who thinks gays are second-class citizens, who voted to reauthorize the Patriot Act and for FISA, and to make class action lawsuits more difficult to file. And if you say to me now's not the right time to vote for your heart, I say, change the poopy diaper of your moderation because this was the same argument against ending slavery and Jim Crow. And Mr. Barack's shit stinks. And Mr. Barack himself smells like Hamburger Helper. But Mr. John is kind of like Rice-a-Roni, the San Francisco treat, jinkle jinkle. That was real popular for a while -- Rice-a-Roni. They gotta bring that back. If they don't bring Rice-a-Roni back pretty soon, I'm moving to Canada. That would be the last sucking liquid out of the straw. The flavor can't be beat. You know, maybe this restaurant reviewing thing isn't working out. Maybe I'm just using it as an excuse to go on political tirades. All I know is that if I'm elected president, I promise a free extra falafel ball in every sandwich, and you will be pleased because I will have no trouble getting an excellent falafel ball as New Orleans has a fuckload of very tasty Middle Eastern restaurants.
Babylon Cafe, 7724 Maple St., 504-314-0010
(Middle Eastern, LD)
My friend Blair thinks this is the best Middle Eastern restaurant in town. Blair is nice, handsome, and witty, but he might be a little meshugana because, he's dead wrong. It's the second best. kittee thinks they have great homemade flatbread though. Even President Punny-Printer would like the grape leaves, I mean dolmas, I mean dolmas.